I’m the guy who will shush you on the Quiet Car of Amtrak. (Look: I don’t CARE how important you think you are, or that, because you got on the train in New Jersey and all the others cars are filled, you feel like you can be Loud Business Guy in the Quiet Car because YOU CAN’T because it’s THE QUIET CAR.) And you can all thank me later because my Crusade for Quietness MIGHT BE SAVING YOUR LIFE.

What’s happening is this: too much beeping. “Doctors and nurses are surrounded by the constant beeping of various alarms,” the Examiner piece reports. “On April 8, the Joint Commission that provides accreditation to hospital in the U.S. has issued a warning about the risks surrounding these alarms.”

The risk is that no one — i.e., nurses, doctors, orderlies, your Higher Power — will listen to alarms anymore because there are too many alarms for things that aren’t actually alarming. “The warning from the Joint Commission suggests that over 85 percent of all alarms do not require clinical interventions. Buried in the din are the alarms intended to summon a medical professional for vital patient care and treatment.”

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going back to my other job of making the world a quieter place so you can LIVE.

Wednesday headlines:

We’re On Forbes, Y’all!: Our inaugural post takes a look at the “uncomfortable positioning of the healthcare of the employees against the health of the business that remains when we talk about healthcare reform in this country.” Also, the writer of that post is SUPER dreamy.

What Happens When Someone is Liked by Both Republicans AND Democrats?: Do they then become a unicorn and stop existing? “Marilyn Tavenner found broad bipartisan support as the Senate Fiance Committee considered her nomination to lead the Centers for Medicaid Services (CMS) — a post that includes overseeing both entitlement programs as well as implementation of the Affordable Care Act.”

If Anyone Can Figure Out What the Frack Marian Cook is Going On About…: I’ll send you a dollar. (In related news: what’s that thing you do to test someone for a stroke?)

China on Healthcare: “During his recent annual budget address, Financial Secretary John Tsang Chun-wah emphasized the importance that government places on providing high-quality healthcare services to Hong Kong people. But it would be naive to think that simply because budget is being invested in facilities, the quality of healthcare will improve.”

Not All Medical Training Programs Are Alike. That…’s Not Great, Right?: “Medical school graduates entering one family medicine residency program might receive training that is markedly different than another family medicine residency program.”

Oregon, My Oregon!: “Legislators in Oregon’s state capitol are working on dozens of bills that will decide exactly what Oregon’s health care system will look like in 2014 and beyond. What’s for sure is that Oregon’s answer to Obamacare will do much more than simply expand health insurance coverage.”

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